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well i have been so busy with work and calvin being home that i have had absolutely no time to blog whatsoever. well he left again yesterday morning for chicago and i'm so depressed about it all over again. we had such a wonderful time while he was home. i just miss him so much it hurts. and the absolute worst part is that i have no idea when i'll get to see him again now. when he left for bootcamp and a school, i knew that i was going to be there for graduation and he was coming home for christmas. but now there is no guarantee to when i get to see him next and it just freaking sucks ass. i have been crying a lot the past day and a half and i just want him to come home. i know the military is a good thing and the experience and benefits for us are great, but him being gone so much is just not worth it to me sometimes. ugh. i just am excited to marry him so i can go with him to places and just be there for him and get a nursing job wherever i am. i honestly do not care where we go as long as i get to be with him that is all that matters. he is my everything and he is my future and i cant wait to start it with him. man i'm a mooshy gooshy freak i know. lol it's just how i feel. school starts back up tomorrow and i'm REALLY not looking forward to it. i just want to get into the program already and do that because that will actually be fun. classes just suck so badly lol. sigh i guess i just need patience. but i'm signing off now so peace out.